2 months

2 months and our First Date

This was good.

Yesterday Matt and I went on our first date since Ramona was born. Since she was 2 weeks early, according to doctors and midwives and we had planned a couple more outing together before we’d have a little baby on our hands, but Ramona had other plans and she was coming when she was ready; and we are SO glad she did.

To me, she’s like the lump of sugar our Grandmothers would have in the sugar bowl, that’s suppose to be a secret, but we happen to know where every sweet thing is in the house.

Anyways, on with the date. We had a great time. I pumped milk and this would be Ramona’s first bottle….eeekkkk. I was really nervous and not thrilled about giving her a bottle, but she’d need one eventually is what I was thinking. We dropped her off at Nonnie’s (Peggy’s House aka Matts Mom) and Granddad was there also. (Its Thanksgiving this week) I was really excited to spend time with my husband alone and laugh and giggle, be silly and be serious, so we headed for our favourite burger joint.  Getting in the car without Rae was kind of weird, but okay. We had a great dinner. Nice and yummy!! Haven’t had burgers like that in awhile. And then I started to look around for Rae and got this feeling of emptiness. Like as if I was a glass of water with a drop of water left in it. Its amazing how attached I am to her. I got a little watery in the eyes and then Matt made me smile. “Its normal,” he said, “It’s our little girl.” It sure is, I thought. And certainly proud of it.

I didn’t think I would call to see how she was doing. “I can handle it!” was my attitude. Huh! Right! I lasted for about 2.5 hours without calling and finally during our desert I called. I just had to know how she was doing. I knew I was feeling the distance (especially my chest that thinks its time to feed her.) and wanted to see if she was… But low and behold, she took the bottle ‘wonderfully,’ were Nonnie’s exact words. And I thought, what a champ! That’s my girl! She’ll eat from anything, as long as its Mommy’s milk, were my thoughts; hoping they were hers too.

So by the 3rd hour, I just want to go and hold her. I felt like my arms were beginning to ache, and they were. We got to Peggy’s and she was cutely sleeping….”Oh please let me hold her,” my insides were saying and somehow women have this intuition (that I am still trying to convince my husband about) so Peggy brought her to me so could hold her. I must’ve had it written all over my forehead.

I smelted her and held her and kissed her so much…like I hadn’t seen her in days, and that’s what it felt like. It’s amazing how much I love her. I can’t really describe it. It’s incredible, and all you Moms out there know what I am talking about.

I really felt like a Mommy yesterday. Being away from my Daughter made me realize how much apart of me she is.